You are not the girl with the tight dress and eyebrow game on point. You are not the girl surrounded by her perfect friends with perfect shades of eyeshadow and perfect smiles and perfect teeth.
You are not the girl that stands in the back of the photo with a red lipstick smile and the identical black miniskirt and flowy top. Who holds her best friend’s hand, who makes kissy faces, who is always surrounded by her other attractive friends, who travels to the bathroom in packs.
You are not the girl who calls her best friend before the party and asks what to wear, who goes to the mall with several others, who reads the group text religiously to know what she’s doing with her Saturday afternoon.
Nope. You are not the ‘Squad Goals’ type.
You are the girl that can do things herself. Who wakes up and pulls on that oversized hoodie and jeans, or sundress, or shorts and a tank-top. Or whatever the hell you want. Because you really don’t care what anyone else thinks and it’s your decision.
You go to the library. To the gym. To the city park. To the farmer’s market and spend the morning sniffing strawberries. You don’t need a group around you. A group of girls to tell you that your makeup is perfect, that your hair is parted the way it should be, that you’re wearing the ‘right’ clothes. You don’t have to fit in, be surrounded by everyone else who looks the same, has the same thoughts. You are just you.
You are the girl that gets on a subway train and wanders around the city. You walk without a map. You ignore everyone’s suggestions and just do your own thing. You aren’t naïve. You just aren’t afraid to do things alone. You trust yourself. You’re confident. And so you face the world solo.
You have friends and you love them. But you aren’t defined by them.
You don’t feel the need to fit in the little box. The little box of ‘cute,’ of ‘sexy,’ of ‘dateable’ of ‘best friend’ of ‘perfect’. You stick your tongue out in pictures. You ditch the pictures all together. You don’t have to be the friend in the back row in a matching outfit. And you aren’t that friend.
You love yourself. And that’s okay. It’s okay not to spend your days worrying about what your girlfriends think, not to immerse yourself in their thoughts and group pictures, not to wear color-coordinated dresses. You have friends and you love them. But you aren’t defined by them.
It’s okay to wake up and do what you want. To shop by yourself. To travel solo. To run the gravel path around your neighborhood alone. It’s okay to not be a ‘Squad Goals’ type of girl. Okay to make each of your days unapologetically yours.
This piece was originally posted on Thought Catalog.
Photo Credit: lil’_wiz